Patrick Osio, Jr
What a guy! Don’t you just love him? Straight talker, says what he means, means what he says. What more can Americans ask for in a President? Oh, not Bush, I am talking about Congressman Tom Tancredo who announced he will most likely be a candidate for president in 2008. Hey, look what he told Muslims – if you can’t control your religious fanatics, we will wipe out Mecca. What will the 1 billion Muslims do without their Mecca? Their anger will turn on Islamic terrorists not the US, and they will wipe them out and then we can all live in peace.
And here all the time everyone figured Tancredo as a one issue kind of guy – illegal immigration. Does the wipe-out Mecca ultimatum give a new perspective about his foreign policy know how, or what? Does he know how to fight terrorism, or what? Tom “Bomb-Mecca” Tancredo has become famous even outside the US.
Well, now that it’s known he is as tough as nail, and since he also considers Mexico as an enemy of the United States, I am compelled to bring to his attention some facts, lest he declares that illegal immigration can be stopped by wiping out Mexico City:
Congressman Tom Tancredo the overwhelming majority of Americans are against illegal immigration – as are the overwhelming majority of illegal immigrants. That’s right Mr. Tancredo, even illegal immigrants are against entering the US illegally. So call off the bombers and let’s talk.
I will refrain from making some of my old jokes about you, which you should know most if not all are not originally mine – I do regret saying that when your rhetoric hit rock-bottom, you began to dig. Well, also the remark that when you open your mouth it’s only to change feet, which I confess was my reaction when hearing your wipe-out Mecca idea. And, yes I take back saying that when you’re in Washington, Centennial, Colorado, where you keep your district office, is deprived of its village idiot.
And when you use demeaning words to describe Mexico’s poor who risk it all, many losing their lives, to come to the US in search of a better life, I did say that you set low personal standards for yourself and you’ve yet to achieve them. And, it was absolutely wrong of me to say that when and if your IQ reaches 50, you should sell, well, 50 was a correction, I actually said 40 when I also said that you had two brain cells – one lost and the other out looking for it; well, OK, and that you needed watering twice a week.
Congressman, how was I supposed to know you were such a macho man? Give me a break here, how many people in office would have thought of saying that we should wipe out Mecca? Your idea is way beyond what any presidential candidate would think, let alone say, so since you have made it clear that you want the people of American to elect you president on the basis that you will stop illegal immigration – well, sir, Mexico City is in imminent danger under your presidency.
And I hate to say this, particularly if you haven’t thought about it, but it would seem that Los Angeles is also in danger since after Mexico City it has the most Mexican citizens.
OK so it was an Angeleno who said that if you were a lunch-special in a Mexican restaurant your plate would be short the enchiladas, taco, tamale and rice, but sir, beans, as you know, can go a long way. Oh, good golly, it was also an Angelo who said that you are shaped like a piñata without the candies.
It does seem that we got off on the wrong foot, no, not the one in your mouth, the other one – damn, there I go again. Well, on the other hand, as long as it takes you two hours to watch 60 Minutes and you refuse to watch 48 Hours because you can’t take two days off work there is really not much to talk about other than what a terrible disgrace you are to the entire nation you profess to love and serve.
Patrick Osio, Jr is Editor of HispanicVista.com (www.hispanicvista.com) Contact at: Posiojr@hispanic.sdcoxmail.com.
© 2005 HispanicVista.com, Inc.